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reno river festival trip report

2005-05-17 - 7:52 p.m.

all photos © 2005 by Elaine Radford
truckee river
this is sort of how to lie with photos, since it was taken from downtown Reno, from a bridge in the Truckee River, but artfully aimed to edit out the casinos and other buildings
Friday May 13

What fools these mortals be. Yes, D. and I were scheduled to fly on America West on a Friday the 13th, but it was even worse than that. We were scheduled to fly on a Friday the 13th without a confirmation number so that we could check-in online and avoid the huge line at the counter. The Clueless Casino who bought the air tickets could not, would not, figure out how or why we would need such a thing as an e-ticket number. "Oh, just tell them you're with the Clueless Casino's group," they said.

Now there's the thing. We didn't want to tell anyone anything, because it involved standing in a long line for 45 minutes. We just wanted to print our boarding passes online like anyone else with a grain of sense and go straight to the security line. But no. Someday the Clueless Casino really must hire me to review all the screw-ups and mishaps and lack-of-professionalisms in their organization. Even when they're trying to do something nice, they have an impressive talent for creating havoc.

flags flying over reno's parking lots
no clue as to why the Canadian flag is flying over Reno's parking lots, but I for one welcome our new Canadian overlords

Anyhoo, after we finally fetched our tickets at the counter, we took one look at the security line of near-Spring-Break-like proportions and realized that there was no way that we would make our flight, which was already boarding, if we played strictly by the rules. Therefore I flashed my Northwest Silver Elite card at the guard and got her to let us ahead of the line. You see, the same gate that serves America West also services Delta and, more importantly for my sneaky purposes, Continental. Continental and Northwest honor each other's elites. America West doesn't honor Northwest elites but it honors Continental's. I gambled that the checker of the boarding pass would not catch the distinction. She did ask, "Why doesn't it say that you're elite on your boarding pass?" I replied, "Because she had trouble printing the ticket." You'll notice that my answer had nothing to do with her question and didn't even make sense. But it worked well enough. We scooted through security in the nick of time and boarded the plane with the rest of the stragglers.

After that, the rest of the trip was a breeze.

sign from a low roller joint across the way
yeah, they have a train that runs through Reno, don't be like the disgruntled VIP on our tour who wouldn't gamble because the casino wouldn't stop the train from interfering with her no doubt badly needed beauty sleep

We ran into a couple of other guys in the club at the Reno airport, but they were going to Tahoe, so we only talked for a few minutes. I hadn't seen one of them since the Deadbeat Alligator days (1996 or so) and I wouldn't have recognized him if I hadn't been reminded. I suspect I might look a little older myself. Damn, we've all come a long ways since we were playing in free tournaments and $1 single deck blackjack games to pick up some spare change.

We had dinner at the Italian restaurant, where I indulged in a Chicken Fettucine Alfredo that was out of this world. I wore the black kidskin pants and the brown geometric top. Afterward, we went to the Clueless Casino's much-ballyhooed dance show, which was so terrible that it defied belief. The comedian was so old that he was telling jokes about The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, and I'm not making it up either. He did mention that he had met Michael Jackson in 1993, which was the only indication given that he'd updated his jokes since 1953.

The redneck-themed decor was interesting. Among the hubcaps lovingly displayed on the walls was an old toilet seat spray painted silver. Now I've truly seen everything.

freestyle competition

Saturday May 14

Looking out the window in the morning, D. spotted a very large buteo being mobbed by at least 4 small birds. And me without my binoculars. It was almost certainly a Red-Tailed Hawk, though; in fact, later in the day, D. would spot that hawk or another that soared close enough to give me a good look at the red tail and dark patagial marks on the wing.

We strolled over to enjoy the Reno River Festival on the Truckee River, in downtown Reno, where we watched the freestyle kayak competition, with the competitors doing flips and somersaults with their kayaks. The former world champion -- and soon-to-be current world champion -- put on an impressive performance that blew the others away. Even our inexperienced eyes could see the quality of the flips.

In the evening, we attended the party for the Trinidad vs. Wright fight, but the fight was a disappointment because Trinidad was hopelessly outclassed. D. had placed a wager that the fight wouldn't go 12 rounds, which was more or less gambling that Trinidad would knock Wright out, since Trinidad won't lie down. However, Trinidad just couldn't find a way to land a punch and get through Wright's defenses, so Wright was the winner on decision based on his clearly superior performance.

kayak capsized in racing competition

Sunday May 15

We returned to the Reno River Festival, this time to enjoy the kayak races. We had excellent seats on the rocks overlooking the river, so we settled in and watched the quarter, semi, and finals for the men's and women's races. These races aren't without their hazards. It appeared to me that the kayaks would deliberately jostle each other. One man was flipped out of his kayak, giving the rescue crew a chance to throw him a rope, although I don't think he really needed it.

We again dined at the Italian restaurant, which is a favorite of D's. Unfortunately, he was feeling unwell and couldn't eat much, but I was delighted with my pork chops diavolo.

kayak racing

Tonight we went to the comedy club, which had actual professional comedians who told funny jokes based on events and personalities that had actually occurred in the 21st century. We laughed and laughed.

Monday May 16

There were no lines at the Reno airport, so our lack of confirmation number didn't cause us the angst, anguish, and grief that it did in New Orleans. The screeners did confiscate a pair of scissors in D's bag that they overlooked in New Orleans, but I think they were just trying to promote their new service, where you can pay a fee of $8 and have small items mailed home to you. D. laughed and said the scissors were only worth $2.

reno laws honored in the brief
all three laws were openly flouted this weekend, to the point where I actually expected to see the Great Dane walk up to the beer tent and order his own "to go" cup of brew

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